Today I discovered another reason I love Google (besides being a great search engine, a fairly good free email service, and of course the parent company of Blogger).
I signed up for AdSense for one of my websites. When I logged in to my account to agree to the ToS, there at the top of the page was a box that said:
Updated - We have made revisions to this agreement in the following sections: 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 11, 12, 13, 15.
HALLELUJAH! Why can't all companies make things this simple and actually point out WHICH sections have changed? That way I might actually read those sections instead of just skipping the whole thing and blindly clicking "accept".
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Whatever happened to soap commercials?
Yesterday in the shower, it dawned on me that it's been years since I remember seeing a soap commercial on prime-time TV. What happened to them all? Are they still shown during daytime tv, or have the companies simply given up on TV advertising? Come to think of it, how many of these soaps even exist anymore?
Here are a few of the ads I remember. Feel free to add any others!
Zest - You're not fully clean unless you're zestfully clean
Safeguard - The smallest soap in the house
Coast - The eye opener
Irish Spring - Fresh and *cat call* clean as a whistle
Dial - Aren't you glad you used Dial? Don't you wish everyone did?
Ivory - So pure, it floats!
Apparently all these soaps do still exist, so what happened to the commercials?
Here are a few of the ads I remember. Feel free to add any others!
Zest - You're not fully clean unless you're zestfully clean
Safeguard - The smallest soap in the house
Coast - The eye opener
Irish Spring - Fresh and *cat call* clean as a whistle
Dial - Aren't you glad you used Dial? Don't you wish everyone did?
Ivory - So pure, it floats!
Apparently all these soaps do still exist, so what happened to the commercials?
Friday, February 17, 2006
Friday Funnies - Cheney's got a gun
Thanks to my wife for sending me this Cheney's Got a Gun parody! (mp3 format) I've seen better lyrics, but this is the only recording I've found.
If you have the time and want a good laugh, check out the first 10 minutes from Monday's Daily Show. (Sorry, it won't let me link directly to the video clip.)
The biggest tragedy in all of this is that Cheney wasn't hunting with George W. A man can dream....
If you have the time and want a good laugh, check out the first 10 minutes from Monday's Daily Show. (Sorry, it won't let me link directly to the video clip.)
The biggest tragedy in all of this is that Cheney wasn't hunting with George W. A man can dream....
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Where did the week go?
Wow... I haven't made an entry since last Monday. Where did the week go? Well, last week I was busy making plans for LM's birthday party, now that my parents are back from Spain.... but then my attention shifted to the weather forecast. And we ended up with a foot of snow, which meant my mom's two sisters and their families couldn't come down from Philly, and only one couple out of the 13 people we invited for the "friends party" actually showed up. My parents came down and brought my grandfather along, but he ended up in the hospital Saturday with a urinary tract infection and dehydration.
Then yesterday I had a root canal, and this morning I finally got to the dermatologist to have him look at a mole or sunspot or whatever you want to call it on my arm, which of course he decided should be removed and sent for a biopsy. Suddenly I feel quite old.
Then yesterday I had a root canal, and this morning I finally got to the dermatologist to have him look at a mole or sunspot or whatever you want to call it on my arm, which of course he decided should be removed and sent for a biopsy. Suddenly I feel quite old.
Monday, February 06, 2006
Music Monday
OK, fine, so it's Tuesday already... well I'll just fudge the date and you'll never know. :)
Last week I talked about an unsigned singer/songwriter Harry Francis that I've been a fan of for 12 years. Today I want to share another band that I have a personal connection to, although this band is in a VERY differeng genre!
While I was at Penn State, I took an electronic music class as part of my Integrative Arts (aka "the build-your-own-major major") curriculum. The class covered all sorts of electronic music topics but focused mostly on MIDI synthesizers and computer-based sequencing software. Also in my class was a guy named Chris Sevanik. Chris was already an electronic music composer in his own right, and had some techno/electronica songs that he had composed and sequenced on his Ensoniq ESQ-1 that he wanted to record to tape. Since my area of interest was recording, we teamed up for our final project and I helped him mix and record his songs.
Anyway... in addition to his techno stuff, Chris was also in an industrial band with his brother, Jason. The band was called Mindless Faith, and they'd occasionally get airplay on the weekend "local music" show or on the late-night hard rock show. Well believe it or not, 10 years later Mindless Faith is still performing and recording new albums! In fact much many of their songs have been featured on MTV's "Road Rules", and they have appeared on at least 16 international compilation albums!
In addition to their own music, Mindless Faith has also gotten into remixing other artists' songs. Specifically, they recently won a Nine Inch Nails remix contest with their remix of 'Only'. Now THAT's impressive!
Anyway, it's been years since I've seen Chris but I'm thrilled to see that Mindless Faith has enjoyed so much success, both with their original music and with their remixes. Hopefully I will get to see them the next time they are in DC!
Last week I talked about an unsigned singer/songwriter Harry Francis that I've been a fan of for 12 years. Today I want to share another band that I have a personal connection to, although this band is in a VERY differeng genre!
While I was at Penn State, I took an electronic music class as part of my Integrative Arts (aka "the build-your-own-major major") curriculum. The class covered all sorts of electronic music topics but focused mostly on MIDI synthesizers and computer-based sequencing software. Also in my class was a guy named Chris Sevanik. Chris was already an electronic music composer in his own right, and had some techno/electronica songs that he had composed and sequenced on his Ensoniq ESQ-1 that he wanted to record to tape. Since my area of interest was recording, we teamed up for our final project and I helped him mix and record his songs.
Anyway... in addition to his techno stuff, Chris was also in an industrial band with his brother, Jason. The band was called Mindless Faith, and they'd occasionally get airplay on the weekend "local music" show or on the late-night hard rock show. Well believe it or not, 10 years later Mindless Faith is still performing and recording new albums! In fact much many of their songs have been featured on MTV's "Road Rules", and they have appeared on at least 16 international compilation albums!
In addition to their own music, Mindless Faith has also gotten into remixing other artists' songs. Specifically, they recently won a Nine Inch Nails remix contest with their remix of 'Only'. Now THAT's impressive!
Anyway, it's been years since I've seen Chris but I'm thrilled to see that Mindless Faith has enjoyed so much success, both with their original music and with their remixes. Hopefully I will get to see them the next time they are in DC!
We've created a monster!
Little Miss had her one year exam last Wednesday (1 year and 10 days old). Here are her vital stats:
Height: 30.5" (90%)
Weight: 23 lbs 5 oz (80%)
Head: 17.75" (55%)
In addition to being so tall, I think she's always looked older than her age because her head is so small in proportion to her body, which makes her look less like a big-headed baby and more like a "little person".
Height: 30.5" (90%)
Weight: 23 lbs 5 oz (80%)
Head: 17.75" (55%)
In addition to being so tall, I think she's always looked older than her age because her head is so small in proportion to her body, which makes her look less like a big-headed baby and more like a "little person".
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Fives Meme
Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so.
1) Overread
2) BrightStar
3) dr four eyes
4) Mystery Mommy
5) MusicLover Marc
Next select five people to tag:
1) ParkHopper
2) MommyGoth
3) My wife. Yes, she has a blog. But I won't link to her because she links to her homepage, which would blow my anonymity. :)
4) Um... I don't read any other blogs on a regular basis! So anyone else who would like to, feel free to tag yourself!
What were you doing 10 years ago?
February 1996: Let's see... I was working at Penn State full-time, subletting an apartment while my girlfriend (later to become my wife) was an hour away at Penn State - Altoona.
What were you doing 1 year ago?
A year ago? My daughter was 10 days old, so it's kind of a blur.
Five snacks you enjoy:
1) Doritos used to be my #1 until they changed the flavor again. Now it's gotta be Tostitos.
2) Popcorn
3) Lightly-salted dry roasted peanuts
4) Homemade chex mix (we call it "nuts and bolts")
5) Oreos
Five songs to which you know all the lyrics:
1) I Know a Chicken (and most other songs from Jack's Big Music Show)
2) Just about every Billy Joel song
3) The Star Spangled Banner (unlike most people)
4) Moondance (which I sang to my wife once)
5) See #2
Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
A million doesn't go far, so let's assume lottery-type winnings.
1) Buy a huge house somewhere outside of the DC metro area (otherwise there wouldn't be anything left!), probably somewhere warmer in the winter and cooler in the summer.
2) Open a recording studio (or buy one).
3) Take a two-week trip to Hawaii (flying first class, of course!)
4) FINALLY get a Corvette
5) Stop collecting 1/18 scale pace cars and start collecting the real thing!
Five bad habits:
1) Biting my fingernails
2) Procrastinating
3) Messiness
4) My short temper/blaming my wife for everything
5) Watching too much tv
Five things you like doing:
1) Watching tv
2) Sunbathing, swimming, sailing, scuba diving... basically any activity that takes place in the tropics
3) Is this a family show? :)
4) "Driving around with the car top down and the radio on"
5) Going to concerts
Five things you would never wear again:
That's a tough one... I'm a guy, so there's not much I've worn that I would be embarrassed by. So I guess I'll say...
1) My Members Only jacket (not like I actually have it anymore)
2) My high school band jacket (which I DO still own)
3) The light-up sun visor that I bought at Disney World
4) Any sort of sun visor, for that matter
5) Long hair (although if I HAD hair, I might consider it)
Five favorite toys:
1) My GPS
2) My telescope
3) My Mustang convertible
4) My HDTV and DVR
5) Card games
1) Overread
2) BrightStar
3) dr four eyes
4) Mystery Mommy
5) MusicLover Marc
Next select five people to tag:
1) ParkHopper
2) MommyGoth
3) My wife. Yes, she has a blog. But I won't link to her because she links to her homepage, which would blow my anonymity. :)
4) Um... I don't read any other blogs on a regular basis! So anyone else who would like to, feel free to tag yourself!
What were you doing 10 years ago?
February 1996: Let's see... I was working at Penn State full-time, subletting an apartment while my girlfriend (later to become my wife) was an hour away at Penn State - Altoona.
What were you doing 1 year ago?
A year ago? My daughter was 10 days old, so it's kind of a blur.
Five snacks you enjoy:
1) Doritos used to be my #1 until they changed the flavor again. Now it's gotta be Tostitos.
2) Popcorn
3) Lightly-salted dry roasted peanuts
4) Homemade chex mix (we call it "nuts and bolts")
5) Oreos
Five songs to which you know all the lyrics:
1) I Know a Chicken (and most other songs from Jack's Big Music Show)
2) Just about every Billy Joel song
3) The Star Spangled Banner (unlike most people)
4) Moondance (which I sang to my wife once)
5) See #2
Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
A million doesn't go far, so let's assume lottery-type winnings.
1) Buy a huge house somewhere outside of the DC metro area (otherwise there wouldn't be anything left!), probably somewhere warmer in the winter and cooler in the summer.
2) Open a recording studio (or buy one).
3) Take a two-week trip to Hawaii (flying first class, of course!)
4) FINALLY get a Corvette
5) Stop collecting 1/18 scale pace cars and start collecting the real thing!
Five bad habits:
1) Biting my fingernails
2) Procrastinating
3) Messiness
4) My short temper/blaming my wife for everything
5) Watching too much tv
Five things you like doing:
1) Watching tv
2) Sunbathing, swimming, sailing, scuba diving... basically any activity that takes place in the tropics
3) Is this a family show? :)
4) "Driving around with the car top down and the radio on"
5) Going to concerts
Five things you would never wear again:
That's a tough one... I'm a guy, so there's not much I've worn that I would be embarrassed by. So I guess I'll say...
1) My Members Only jacket (not like I actually have it anymore)
2) My high school band jacket (which I DO still own)
3) The light-up sun visor that I bought at Disney World
4) Any sort of sun visor, for that matter
5) Long hair (although if I HAD hair, I might consider it)
Five favorite toys:
1) My GPS
2) My telescope
3) My Mustang convertible
4) My HDTV and DVR
5) Card games
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
WTNH.com - State challenges No Child Left Behind
WTNH.com - State challenges No Child Left Behind: "A showdown today over the 'No Child Left Behind' education law. Connecticut is suing the federal, claiming the state isn't getting enough money to cover the costs laws requirements."
Wow. Clearly the education system failed the author of this article! Maybe it's time for No Journalist Left Behind?
Wow. Clearly the education system failed the author of this article! Maybe it's time for No Journalist Left Behind?
Monday, January 30, 2006
Music Monday
It's Monday! Time for another last-minute Music Monday post! Actually I have three things that I was going to talk about today, but I think I'll save one for next week.
First let me share some great news. I got my Billy Joel tickets! I was able to snag two 200-level seats for the April 14th show in DC. What's ridiculous is that even the 200-level tickets were $89.50 -- worse yet is the $14.30 PER TICKET convenience charge plus $4.50 order processing that Ticketbastard charges! That's over $106 per ticket. Oh well... Billy Joel puts on a great show, often playing almost 3 hours, so I guess it's worth it. And you never know when he'll stop touring. I believe this will be my 8th Billy Joel concert (two of those were with Elton John and one was actually a master class lecture series).
Now for my second Music Monday topic. This one's also a bit of a rant. Friday my wife IM'd me about a song she had heard on her way to work, "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter. Yeah, it's a good song. So what's my rant? Well, Powter reminds me a lot of a great singer/songwriter out of the Philadelphia area, Harry Francis. Harry used to play keyboards for Mr. Greengenes, a fantastic alternative cover band that I've been going to see since they formed at West Chester U. 12 years ago. What I don't get is how someone like Daniel Powter can get a major record contract and have a single getting national airplay while someone like Harry remains unsigned. Harry is a great singer/songwriter and piano player, and his songs are catchy and very radio-friendly, which is why I can't figure out how he hasn't been picked up by a major label yet. Anyway, I encourage you to check out Harry's website and if you like what you hear, pick up a copy of his CD!
First let me share some great news. I got my Billy Joel tickets! I was able to snag two 200-level seats for the April 14th show in DC. What's ridiculous is that even the 200-level tickets were $89.50 -- worse yet is the $14.30 PER TICKET convenience charge plus $4.50 order processing that Ticketbastard charges! That's over $106 per ticket. Oh well... Billy Joel puts on a great show, often playing almost 3 hours, so I guess it's worth it. And you never know when he'll stop touring. I believe this will be my 8th Billy Joel concert (two of those were with Elton John and one was actually a master class lecture series).
Now for my second Music Monday topic. This one's also a bit of a rant. Friday my wife IM'd me about a song she had heard on her way to work, "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter. Yeah, it's a good song. So what's my rant? Well, Powter reminds me a lot of a great singer/songwriter out of the Philadelphia area, Harry Francis. Harry used to play keyboards for Mr. Greengenes, a fantastic alternative cover band that I've been going to see since they formed at West Chester U. 12 years ago. What I don't get is how someone like Daniel Powter can get a major record contract and have a single getting national airplay while someone like Harry remains unsigned. Harry is a great singer/songwriter and piano player, and his songs are catchy and very radio-friendly, which is why I can't figure out how he hasn't been picked up by a major label yet. Anyway, I encourage you to check out Harry's website and if you like what you hear, pick up a copy of his CD!
Friday, January 27, 2006
25 Questions meme
OK, I know I still owe Liz the Meme of Fours, but this one looked interesting and actually a bit easeier!
1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
How the fuck did I manage to chew a hole in my moustache? (Don't ask.)
2. How much cash do you have on you?
About $100, but only because we sold our fake fireplace last night for cash.
3. What's a word that rhymes with TEST? Jest
4. planet? Mars
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list?
My cell died today, so I guess all calls will be missed calls for the next few days.
6. What is your favorite ring on your phone?
Before my phone died the last time, it played 'Fight on State'. But my wife's phone also had the same ring, which made it quite difficult to tell them apart. Now my phone's ring sounds like a train.
7. What shirt are you wearing?
Hmmm... just looked through the Land's End website and can't find it... but it's a purple-blue striped oxford.
8. What do you label yourself? Geek, musician, tv addict... all of the above?
9. Name the brand of shoes you've recently worn. Rockport and Land's End
10. Bright or Dark Room? I prefer dim, but not dark.
11. What were you doing at midnight last night? Getting a book packaged up to mail out.
12. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
You have been outbid on.....
13. Where is your nearest 7-11? About a half mile from work.
14. What's a saying that you say a lot?
Hmmm.... I don't really have a catch phrase! Maybe 'in a sec'.
15.Who told you they loved you last? My wife.
16. Last furry thing you touched? My sweet fluffy poodle-doodle!
17. How Many Drugs Have You Done In The Past three Days?
Ugh. My back and neck have been killing me for the past week -- Aleve during the day and advil at night. Plus Mucinex and Adderall. I guess that's four.
18. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
Two, but I need to actually finish them first.
19. Favorite age you have been so far?
Either 24 (the age when I got married) or 32 (the age when my daughter was born).
20. your worst enemy? My alarm clock.
21. What is your current desktop picture? This.
22. What was the last thing you said to someone?
I'll be upstairs in a minute. (Oh, that was 2 hours ago... oops!)
23. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly, which would you choose?
The money's much more practical. Might buy myself a flying car, though.
24. Do you like someone? Of course! Life wouldn't be much fun if I didn't.
25. The last song you listened to?
Currently listening to Alanis Morisette on the Tonight Show singing a song from The Chronicles of Narnia soundtrack.
1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
How the fuck did I manage to chew a hole in my moustache? (Don't ask.)
2. How much cash do you have on you?
About $100, but only because we sold our fake fireplace last night for cash.
3. What's a word that rhymes with TEST? Jest
4. planet? Mars
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list?
My cell died today, so I guess all calls will be missed calls for the next few days.
6. What is your favorite ring on your phone?
Before my phone died the last time, it played 'Fight on State'. But my wife's phone also had the same ring, which made it quite difficult to tell them apart. Now my phone's ring sounds like a train.
7. What shirt are you wearing?
Hmmm... just looked through the Land's End website and can't find it... but it's a purple-blue striped oxford.
8. What do you label yourself? Geek, musician, tv addict... all of the above?
9. Name the brand of shoes you've recently worn. Rockport and Land's End
10. Bright or Dark Room? I prefer dim, but not dark.
11. What were you doing at midnight last night? Getting a book packaged up to mail out.
12. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
You have been outbid on.....
13. Where is your nearest 7-11? About a half mile from work.
14. What's a saying that you say a lot?
Hmmm.... I don't really have a catch phrase! Maybe 'in a sec'.
15.Who told you they loved you last? My wife.
16. Last furry thing you touched? My sweet fluffy poodle-doodle!
17. How Many Drugs Have You Done In The Past three Days?
Ugh. My back and neck have been killing me for the past week -- Aleve during the day and advil at night. Plus Mucinex and Adderall. I guess that's four.
18. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
Two, but I need to actually finish them first.
19. Favorite age you have been so far?
Either 24 (the age when I got married) or 32 (the age when my daughter was born).
20. your worst enemy? My alarm clock.
21. What is your current desktop picture? This.
22. What was the last thing you said to someone?
I'll be upstairs in a minute. (Oh, that was 2 hours ago... oops!)
23. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly, which would you choose?
The money's much more practical. Might buy myself a flying car, though.
24. Do you like someone? Of course! Life wouldn't be much fun if I didn't.
25. The last song you listened to?
Currently listening to Alanis Morisette on the Tonight Show singing a song from The Chronicles of Narnia soundtrack.
Friday Funnies
Well I never had time for Thursday's Rant, but I wanted to post Friday Funnies before the end of the day.
My wife forwarded this to me and I just had to share. I'm sure most people have seen this before, but it's still funny. Parents will especially like numbers 3 and 4. :)
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my Sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY: Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled, "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....a true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
My wife forwarded this to me and I just had to share. I'm sure most people have seen this before, but it's still funny. Parents will especially like numbers 3 and 4. :)
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my Sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY: Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled, "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....a true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Sesame Street Terror Alert Level
If you've been to Phantom Scribbler's blog, you've probably seen the Sesame Street Terror Alert Level:
Does it strike anybody else as odd that as the threat level goes down, the terror level of the Sesame Street character goes UP?? I mean Elmo is by far the most innocuous character, Ernie is almost as harmless, Bert can be a little creepy, Cookie Monster is, after all, a monster, and Oscar is just plain grouchy. (But hey, he's got that "shelter in place" thing down to a science!)
So if the terror level is Elmo, am I supposed to be scared or happy?
Elmo knows your (f***ing) name
Here's my whine, a day early.
Before Christmas I discovered a toy called Elmo Knows Your Name. Cool little bugger... you hook him up to your computer and you can program your kid's name, birthday, favorite color, etc. "Cool," I thought, "a toy for LM and a geek gadget for me all wrapped into one!"
Well, after 15 minutes of cutting tape, twist-ties, and plastic fasteners, and another 15 minutes of installing software, I was finally ready to download the customized settings to the doll. It got about 99% done and then said the download failed. I tried it out and it seemed to be working... it knew LM's name and that it was her birthday, so I wrapped it up for her to open. But when she opened it and tried it out, it played just a bit of Elmo's birthday song, went right into A-B-C, and then apparently hung and wouldn't play anything until the batteries were removed! We tried my wife's computer and she couldn't get the settings to download to the doll at all. So mommy headed off to the store to get a new doll.
So after more cutting and unpackaging (but luckily no reinstalling of software), I tried the download again, and once again it got about 99% done and then failed! This time it at least played the first two songs properly and started the third song, and then cycled through them again (with each press of Elmo's stomach), so we decided it was working well enough to at least give to Little Miss. But I want the stupid thing to work properly!
I went to Fisher Price's help website and went through the troubleshooting walk-thru, and all it says is that if you get an error and the doll doesn't work right, you have a defective doll! What kind of help is that? So today I called a live support tech and he made a few suggestions such as trying a different USB port, but nothing really concrete. I'll have to try a few things, including trying my wife's computer again, and then call tech support again while I have the doll hooked up if nothing else works. I just find it hard to believe that we could have gotten two defective dolls in a row. *sigh*
Serves me right for buying a toy that has to be set up using your computer.
*** UPDATE ***
Thanks SO MUCH to Mommygoth for mentioning the reviews on Amazon. After reading the reviews, I tried turning off my virus software and I was able to successfully download the settings to Elmo. Now that he works properly, he is pretty cool!
Before Christmas I discovered a toy called Elmo Knows Your Name. Cool little bugger... you hook him up to your computer and you can program your kid's name, birthday, favorite color, etc. "Cool," I thought, "a toy for LM and a geek gadget for me all wrapped into one!"
Well, after 15 minutes of cutting tape, twist-ties, and plastic fasteners, and another 15 minutes of installing software, I was finally ready to download the customized settings to the doll. It got about 99% done and then said the download failed. I tried it out and it seemed to be working... it knew LM's name and that it was her birthday, so I wrapped it up for her to open. But when she opened it and tried it out, it played just a bit of Elmo's birthday song, went right into A-B-C, and then apparently hung and wouldn't play anything until the batteries were removed! We tried my wife's computer and she couldn't get the settings to download to the doll at all. So mommy headed off to the store to get a new doll.
So after more cutting and unpackaging (but luckily no reinstalling of software), I tried the download again, and once again it got about 99% done and then failed! This time it at least played the first two songs properly and started the third song, and then cycled through them again (with each press of Elmo's stomach), so we decided it was working well enough to at least give to Little Miss. But I want the stupid thing to work properly!
I went to Fisher Price's help website and went through the troubleshooting walk-thru, and all it says is that if you get an error and the doll doesn't work right, you have a defective doll! What kind of help is that? So today I called a live support tech and he made a few suggestions such as trying a different USB port, but nothing really concrete. I'll have to try a few things, including trying my wife's computer again, and then call tech support again while I have the doll hooked up if nothing else works. I just find it hard to believe that we could have gotten two defective dolls in a row. *sigh*
Serves me right for buying a toy that has to be set up using your computer.
*** UPDATE ***
Thanks SO MUCH to Mommygoth for mentioning the reviews on Amazon. After reading the reviews, I tried turning off my virus software and I was able to successfully download the settings to Elmo. Now that he works properly, he is pretty cool!
Monday, January 23, 2006
Music Monday
As you know, I am a big reality TV fan, and I'm also a huge music fan. So when you put a show like Rock Star: INXS on the air, you can bet I'm gonna watch!
I must admit I was initially disappointed with the outcome of the show... I thought MiG had the better voice for INXS, and J.D. really acted like a pompous and irresponsible ass (or at least that's the way they made it look on TV). But after listening to the new INXS album Switch, it's clear they made the absolute right decision.
You've probably heard the first single Pretty Vegas on the radio or even in promos for the TV show Las Vegas, but if you haven't heard the whole album, you're really missing out. Listen to the first track, Devil's Party, and you'll swear it's Michael Hutchence reincarnated. But J.D. isn't just a Hutchence imitator. He brings his own style with Pretty Vegas and Never Let You Go, and even seems to channel the sounds of Lenny Kravitz (on Remember Who's Your Man) and David Bowie (on Hungry). But my favorite track hands down is Afterglow. This hauntingly beautiful song sounds like could have stepped off U2's Joshua Tree, with maybe a hint of Genesis thrown in too.
If you liked INXS in the 80's, you'll love Switch. Even if you didn't watch Rock Star, or if you did but didn't like J.D., you still owe it to yourself to check out this album.
I must admit I was initially disappointed with the outcome of the show... I thought MiG had the better voice for INXS, and J.D. really acted like a pompous and irresponsible ass (or at least that's the way they made it look on TV). But after listening to the new INXS album Switch, it's clear they made the absolute right decision.
You've probably heard the first single Pretty Vegas on the radio or even in promos for the TV show Las Vegas, but if you haven't heard the whole album, you're really missing out. Listen to the first track, Devil's Party, and you'll swear it's Michael Hutchence reincarnated. But J.D. isn't just a Hutchence imitator. He brings his own style with Pretty Vegas and Never Let You Go, and even seems to channel the sounds of Lenny Kravitz (on Remember Who's Your Man) and David Bowie (on Hungry). But my favorite track hands down is Afterglow. This hauntingly beautiful song sounds like could have stepped off U2's Joshua Tree, with maybe a hint of Genesis thrown in too.
If you liked INXS in the 80's, you'll love Switch. Even if you didn't watch Rock Star, or if you did but didn't like J.D., you still owe it to yourself to check out this album.
When does Jack Bauer pee?
24 is one of the best shows on TV, but I do have one complaint... when does Jack Bauer pee? I mean the show is supposed to be in real-time, and sure, there are scenes where they aren't showing Jack, but typically he's off chasing someone or running from someone or shooting at someone! So seriously, when does the guy go to the bathroom? Are you telling me he goes a whole 24 hours without peeing?
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Little Miss turns one
Today is LM's first birthday. It's hard to believe that a year ago we were in Big Corporate Hospital for an attempted manual version (after months and months of planning to deliver at Little Midwife Birthing Center) which failed and left us no choice but to opt for a C-section, all the while worrying about the predicted 12 inches of snow and whether any relatives would be able to come visit us, not to mention bring me a change of clothes. (We were packed for a 12-hour stay at the birthing center, not a 3-day stay after a c-section!) To be honest, it does seem like ages ago when Little Miss started sitting up, crawling, and all those early milestones. But it really is amazing how quickly the first year has gone.
We didn't really do much in the way of celebrating, mostly since my parents are in Spain for another two weeks, but LM did get a bunch of presents. From us she got a musical phone, a vibrating "laughing cow" ball, and Elmo Knows Your Name... although wouldn't you know it but it turned out Elmo was defective and I couldn't get him properly programmed! So today it was off to Wally World to return Elmo and then over to Target for a new one since we couldn't find any more at Wal-mart. She also got a cute singing and bouncing bird (dances to "If you're happy and you know it") from her maternal grandparents, a really soft stuffed frog from her great-aunt, and a Reebok outfit and a book that plays music from another great-aunt and great-uncle. I'm sure there will be lots more presents coming, and we're hoping to have a party for her in early February when my parents are back.
Now I just have to figure out what I need to properly decorate this Blue's Clues cake I'm planning to make!
We didn't really do much in the way of celebrating, mostly since my parents are in Spain for another two weeks, but LM did get a bunch of presents. From us she got a musical phone, a vibrating "laughing cow" ball, and Elmo Knows Your Name... although wouldn't you know it but it turned out Elmo was defective and I couldn't get him properly programmed! So today it was off to Wally World to return Elmo and then over to Target for a new one since we couldn't find any more at Wal-mart. She also got a cute singing and bouncing bird (dances to "If you're happy and you know it") from her maternal grandparents, a really soft stuffed frog from her great-aunt, and a Reebok outfit and a book that plays music from another great-aunt and great-uncle. I'm sure there will be lots more presents coming, and we're hoping to have a party for her in early February when my parents are back.
Now I just have to figure out what I need to properly decorate this Blue's Clues cake I'm planning to make!
Friday, January 20, 2006
Friday Funnies - "Being IT"
More IT humor for you this week. No explanation needed, just hop over to Dice and play Being IT! Oh, and if you're not in IT but ever wondered what a computer geek's job is like, you should check this out too! :)
Thursday, January 19, 2006
American Idol
Would you please do me a favor and visit my Idol Go Home blog? They're offering a $250 prize for the blogger with the most traffic, and every click helps!
Also, if you're an American Idol fan, why not sign up for Idol Go Home and play along? You could win a trip to the American Idol finale in Hollywood, a Dell laptop, an Xbox 360, or other great prizes!
Also, if you're an American Idol fan, why not sign up for Idol Go Home and play along? You could win a trip to the American Idol finale in Hollywood, a Dell laptop, an Xbox 360, or other great prizes!
Thursday's Rant
Today's rant will be the first of many to deal with stupid or inconsiderate drivers. It seems like the DC area has an especially large number of idiot drivers, so I know I'll have plenty to rant about.
Today's rant has to do with making a right turn on red.
Making a right turn on a red light is legal in all 50 states and DC (except in New York City), but drivers must come to a full stop and yield the right-of-way to pedestrians and traffic with the green light. The idea is simple -- if there's no traffic coming and you can safely make a right turn, you shouldn't have to wait for a green light.
The DC suburbs and especially northern Virginia are notorious for heavy traffic at just about any time of the day or night. During rush hour, this often means stop-and-go traffic on major thoroughfares, and frequently this leads to traffic backing up across an intersection. If a driver can see that the traffic is backed up on the other side of an intersection, the proper and courteous thing to do is to stop before entering the intersection, even if he/she has a green light, until there is enough room for the driver to get completely across the intersection on the other side.
Now if you are sitting at an intersection waiting to make a right turn on red, and I am approaching from your left with a green light but I stop before entering the intersection because the traffic is stopped on the other side, THIS DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT OF WAY TO MAKE YOUR RIGHT TURN IN FRONT OF ME!! You must still YIELD THE RIGHT OF WAY to traffic with the green light! When traffic starts to move again, I have the right to take that spot, not you! Plus by sneaking your way out and stealing MY spot in the traffic parade, I either end up stopping in the middle of the intersection or I have to sit and wait some more, where I could end up missing the change of the light or worse yet, have another impatient right-turn-on-red-maker jump out in front of me!
This scenario has happened to me more times than I can count. Not only does rude behavior like this lead to more gridlock, but it also creates even more rude and aggressive drivers! Now because of this rampant tactic of people trying to cut in whenever they can, I find that I'm less likely to stop before the intersection even if it means blocking part of the intersection. People just need to learn take their turn and try to be a little more patient. I know waiting your turn sucks, especially during rush hour when you're already late, but if everyone could just try to show a LITTLE more courtesy, the roads would be so much more pleasant.
Today's rant has to do with making a right turn on red.
Making a right turn on a red light is legal in all 50 states and DC (except in New York City), but drivers must come to a full stop and yield the right-of-way to pedestrians and traffic with the green light. The idea is simple -- if there's no traffic coming and you can safely make a right turn, you shouldn't have to wait for a green light.
The DC suburbs and especially northern Virginia are notorious for heavy traffic at just about any time of the day or night. During rush hour, this often means stop-and-go traffic on major thoroughfares, and frequently this leads to traffic backing up across an intersection. If a driver can see that the traffic is backed up on the other side of an intersection, the proper and courteous thing to do is to stop before entering the intersection, even if he/she has a green light, until there is enough room for the driver to get completely across the intersection on the other side.
Now if you are sitting at an intersection waiting to make a right turn on red, and I am approaching from your left with a green light but I stop before entering the intersection because the traffic is stopped on the other side, THIS DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT OF WAY TO MAKE YOUR RIGHT TURN IN FRONT OF ME!! You must still YIELD THE RIGHT OF WAY to traffic with the green light! When traffic starts to move again, I have the right to take that spot, not you! Plus by sneaking your way out and stealing MY spot in the traffic parade, I either end up stopping in the middle of the intersection or I have to sit and wait some more, where I could end up missing the change of the light or worse yet, have another impatient right-turn-on-red-maker jump out in front of me!
This scenario has happened to me more times than I can count. Not only does rude behavior like this lead to more gridlock, but it also creates even more rude and aggressive drivers! Now because of this rampant tactic of people trying to cut in whenever they can, I find that I'm less likely to stop before the intersection even if it means blocking part of the intersection. People just need to learn take their turn and try to be a little more patient. I know waiting your turn sucks, especially during rush hour when you're already late, but if everyone could just try to show a LITTLE more courtesy, the roads would be so much more pleasant.
Monday, January 16, 2006
Music Monday
OK, so Music Monday is a little late today. I wasn't at work today due to the MLK holiday, so it didn't feel like a Monday to me.
Today Music Monday has to be about tomorrow's big event -- American Idol! Of course the show hasn't started yet, so there's not much to talk about!
I do have some bad news... apparently being selected as a blogger for Idol Go Home wasn't as big an honor as I thought. I thought I was going to be an official blogger. Turns out it's basically open to anyone who wants to blog.
IGH is also running a blogger contest, with prizes for the blogger with the most traffic to their blog. I haven't even made my first post yet, but please visit my Idol Go Home blog here!
Also, if you'd like to sign up for Idol Go Home, send me an email and I will send you a referral link. Each referral enters me for a drawing for $500!
Sorry to cut this so short, but it's getting late and I'd like to make my first post to IGH tonight before heading to bed.
Today Music Monday has to be about tomorrow's big event -- American Idol! Of course the show hasn't started yet, so there's not much to talk about!
I do have some bad news... apparently being selected as a blogger for Idol Go Home wasn't as big an honor as I thought. I thought I was going to be an official blogger. Turns out it's basically open to anyone who wants to blog.
IGH is also running a blogger contest, with prizes for the blogger with the most traffic to their blog. I haven't even made my first post yet, but please visit my Idol Go Home blog here!
Also, if you'd like to sign up for Idol Go Home, send me an email and I will send you a referral link. Each referral enters me for a drawing for $500!
Sorry to cut this so short, but it's getting late and I'd like to make my first post to IGH tonight before heading to bed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
